PSYCHIATRIC VIEWS ON THE DAILY NEWS
Normally and often, people change and develop so slowly over time that it is almost imperceptible to us. We feel like the same person, even if we have changed a lot over some years. However, there are certain events that cause more disruptive changes.
One of the striking aspects of the LA wildfires that we covered in the last column is that the loss of life has thankfully been quite limited, but the loss of homes and their contents are immense. In response to that, we often hear that the homes and its contents are just “things,” and that things can be replaced. Of course, that is a reassuring statement. However, there are so many “things” and triggers in many houses, especially for people who do not have most everything on their phones, that feel like they are part of us, remind us of precious memories, and evoke the individuals we love and have loved. From trinkets to pets, much is irreplaceable and does matter, often greatly.
Although it is often ignored or downplayed, I think there is a similar psychological process involved in the emergence of a mental disorder or disturbance. Here, we are at risk of losing the sense of who we thought we were and now are. In my clinical experience, that seems to especially occur in those with schizophrenia, posttraumatic stress disorder, and Alzheimer disease as examples. In these illnesses, even with much recovery, one may never return to who they were. Loved ones will often notice and feel this, too. This altered sense of self does not seem to happen as much or as strongly with other medical illnesses.
Both of these kinds of losses may also include the future, the loss of who we thought we could or would be. Mental disorders can shatter dreams for one’s personal future. Losses of things can be for the future, too. CNN reported that one young couple recently bought a home in the Pacific Palisades. The father of the son was a refugee who originally bought and lived in a trailer. Now the couple are sort of refugees in their own community. Refugees and immigrants have to go through a similar process of getting over loss. The couple are expecting their first child in a week or 2. The day before evacuating, they finished the nursery. Then the house burned down. Keeping them positive for now is that their son will never know of the loss.
For all these kinds of significant personal losses of oneself and of things we love, an adequate grieving process in recommended. Finding some acceptable meaning is the key last stage. It is even worth doing for small, more common losses. This kind of response is more than the saying “roll with the punch.” It is finding ways to avoid future similar punches or fighting back successfully. In fact, periodically imagining losing things of importance, even life, is useful psychological preparation for the future.
Though not losing a life is the ultimate essential, even that is sometimes not enough, most starkly and tragically seen in suicides. Whatever gives our lives the most meaning is important to try to keep, but whatever of importance that is lost is important to grieve adequately in order to move on successfully. Along with the grieving, a new vision for the future, like that couple has, can buoy us via the support of loved ones and the community and resilience—and even posttraumatic growth is possible.
Dr Moffic is an award-winning psychiatrist who specialized in the cultural and ethical aspects of psychiatry and is now in retirement and retirement as a private pro bono community psychiatrist. A prolific writer and speaker, he has done a weekday column titled “Psychiatric Views on the Daily News” and a weekly video, “Psychiatry & Society,” since the COVID-19 pandemic emerged. He was chosen to receive the 2024 Abraham Halpern Humanitarian Award from the American Association for Social Psychiatry. Previously, he received the Administrative Award in 2016 from the American Psychiatric Association, the one-time designation of being a Hero of Public Psychiatry from the Speaker of the Assembly of the APA in 2002, and the Exemplary Psychiatrist Award from the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill in 1991. He presented the third Rabbi Jeffrey B. Stiffman lecture at Congregation Shaare Emeth in St. Louis on Sunday, May 19, 2024. He is an advocate and activist for mental health issues related to climate instability, physician burnout, and xenophobia. He is now editing the final book in a 4-volume series on religions and psychiatry for Springer: Islamophobia, anti-Semitism, Christianity, and now The Eastern Religions, and Spirituality. He serves on the Editorial Board of Psychiatric Times.
Blog
Article
Social Psychiatric New Year Resolution #3: Overcoming the Loss of Who We Are, Were, and Would Be
Author(s):
Key Takeaways
- Significant life events can disrupt one's sense of self and future, necessitating a grieving process for recovery.
- Personal belongings often hold sentimental value, making their loss emotionally impactful, similar to identity changes in mental disorders.
- Mental disorders can alter identity, affecting both individuals and their loved ones, unlike other medical illnesses.
- Adequate grieving and finding meaning are crucial for coping with losses, fostering resilience and posttraumatic growth.
SHOW MOREThe LA fires demonstrate the incredibly difficult process of loss and grieving past selves…
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PSYCHIATRIC VIEWS ON THE DAILY NEWS
Normally and often, people change and develop so slowly over time that it is almost imperceptible to us. We feel like the same person, even if we have changed a lot over some years. However, there are certain events that cause more disruptive changes.
One of the striking aspects of the LA wildfires that we covered in the last column is that the loss of life has thankfully been quite limited, but the loss of homes and their contents are immense. In response to that, we often hear that the homes and its contents are just “things,” and that things can be replaced. Of course, that is a reassuring statement. However, there are so many “things” and triggers in many houses, especially for people who do not have most everything on their phones, that feel like they are part of us, remind us of precious memories, and evoke the individuals we love and have loved. From trinkets to pets, much is irreplaceable and does matter, often greatly.
Although it is often ignored or downplayed, I think there is a similar psychological process involved in the emergence of a mental disorder or disturbance. Here, we are at risk of losing the sense of who we thought we were and now are. In my clinical experience, that seems to especially occur in those with schizophrenia, posttraumatic stress disorder, and Alzheimer disease as examples. In these illnesses, even with much recovery, one may never return to who they were. Loved ones will often notice and feel this, too. This altered sense of self does not seem to happen as much or as strongly with other medical illnesses.
Both of these kinds of losses may also include the future, the loss of who we thought we could or would be. Mental disorders can shatter dreams for one’s personal future. Losses of things can be for the future, too. CNN reported that one young couple recently bought a home in the Pacific Palisades. The father of the son was a refugee who originally bought and lived in a trailer. Now the couple are sort of refugees in their own community. Refugees and immigrants have to go through a similar process of getting over loss. The couple are expecting their first child in a week or 2. The day before evacuating, they finished the nursery. Then the house burned down. Keeping them positive for now is that their son will never know of the loss.
For all these kinds of significant personal losses of oneself and of things we love, an adequate grieving process in recommended. Finding some acceptable meaning is the key last stage. It is even worth doing for small, more common losses. This kind of response is more than the saying “roll with the punch.” It is finding ways to avoid future similar punches or fighting back successfully. In fact, periodically imagining losing things of importance, even life, is useful psychological preparation for the future.
Though not losing a life is the ultimate essential, even that is sometimes not enough, most starkly and tragically seen in suicides. Whatever gives our lives the most meaning is important to try to keep, but whatever of importance that is lost is important to grieve adequately in order to move on successfully. Along with the grieving, a new vision for the future, like that couple has, can buoy us via the support of loved ones and the community and resilience—and even posttraumatic growth is possible.
Dr Moffic is an award-winning psychiatrist who specialized in the cultural and ethical aspects of psychiatry and is now in retirement and retirement as a private pro bono community psychiatrist. A prolific writer and speaker, he has done a weekday column titled “Psychiatric Views on the Daily News” and a weekly video, “Psychiatry & Society,” since the COVID-19 pandemic emerged. He was chosen to receive the 2024 Abraham Halpern Humanitarian Award from the American Association for Social Psychiatry. Previously, he received the Administrative Award in 2016 from the American Psychiatric Association, the one-time designation of being a Hero of Public Psychiatry from the Speaker of the Assembly of the APA in 2002, and the Exemplary Psychiatrist Award from the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill in 1991. He presented the third Rabbi Jeffrey B. Stiffman lecture at Congregation Shaare Emeth in St. Louis on Sunday, May 19, 2024. He is an advocate and activist for mental health issues related to climate instability, physician burnout, and xenophobia. He is now editing the final book in a 4-volume series on religions and psychiatry for Springer: Islamophobia, anti-Semitism, Christianity, and now The Eastern Religions, and Spirituality. He serves on the Editorial Board of Psychiatric Times.
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Social Psychiatric New Year Resolution #2: Stopping the Climate Bombs
Facing the First Days of the Pandemic: A Conversation With David Chong, MD, and Sara Nash, MD
Positive Psychiatry in the Life of Jimmy Carter
Psychiatry’s Gender Trouble
Preparing for a Socially Scary New Year and What We Can Do About It
A Chrismukkah Essay Contest for Psychiatrists